You Can Stop Telling Me What To Do Already

I’m doing everything Medium tells me to, starting today.

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Photo by Carl Heyerdahl

Today is the day I start creating my email list, Shaunta Grimes and Shannon Ashley. You can stop pushing now. (Not really. Push away. Please!).

I promise to work out, fearlessly, Ashley Alt. Although it won’t be spin cycling, there is a recumbent bike in my apartment gym. Or there was, the last time I was there six months ago. Goals.

I will start my new diet, as soon as I can decide which one, Markham Heid. Low carb has always worked best for me to lose those stubborn 20 pounds, gain them back, and lose them again 20 years later, Dr. David Ludwig. There’s something about the number 20.

But maybe Keto? Or 5:2 fasting, Dave Wentworth? Carnivore diet, Andy Lindquist? Quickly, I need advice on how to make decisions!

Where are you when I need you Rachel Clements? There you are! Thank you for sharing your parents’ admonition that “More freedom comes with more responsibility,’ or “Don’t screw this up.” What if I screw up dieting? Is that even possible? Yes, if I don’t decide which one. As you said, “…and indecision is a real b*tch.”

Let’s put dieting on the back burner for now (see what I did there?). I promise not to procrastinate today.

Wait, didn’t I just do that with the dieting decision? Ok, here goes, Elle Kaplan. Five, four, three, two, one…I choose the Carbohydrate Addicts diet. It’s a real thing. No carbs for two meals and a snack. Anything you want for the third meal. I’ll keep you all posted.

Thanks Elle Kaplan. The 5 second rule really does destroy procrastination, as you point out in your excellent article. I use it and teach it to my clients.

Speaking of clients. They are one of my income streams, Shaunta Grimes. Often my work as a psychotherapist and hypnotherapist informs my writing, Jessica Wildfire. Their struggles, revelations and changes inspire me everyday. But, where I used to constantly seek out new clients, I now charge what I’m worth. Now I see fewer clients in order to build my other streams of income with writing, podcasts, and public speaking.

Ok, I’ve actually just recently begun charging what I’m worth. I’ve started dropping the false safety net of insurance companies, that low-ball what they pay therapists with the promise of more clients. Let’s see: Work harder and longer for less money. Yeah, NO.

Thank you, John Kim, The Angry Therapist, for helping me realize the foolishness of seeking safety above monetary success, and the fulfillment of doing therapy my way. And yes, I will take your coaching course with the extra money. Five, four, three, two, one. Oh damn.

Right after I do five steps to better writing Linda Caroll. Then I’ll do five things before lunch, Shaunta Grimes. You seem to be shaking out to be the CEO of the board of Medium directors in my head.

Helen Cassidy Page , today I will be a badass, like you.

Kyrie Gray , I promise to laugh every day, but more than that, I want to get to be as good as you are at making people laugh.

I will be less Frazzled, Andrew Knott . Or at least write about being frazzled with humor.

P.S.i love you, Kris Gage and Kay Bolden. You tell me how to be brave and strong. Plus, sometimes you read and applaud my posts. Thank you for your encouragement. I’m going to continue my solo travel, as you both suggest. It’s fun to see people’s reaction to a woman of a certain age traveling alone. In a word, impressed. And Kris Gage , starting today, I’m applying the 5 Love languages to showing myself love.

traceybyfire, you make me want to be as real as possible about sexuality and all the twists and turns that can take. I’m doing more sex writing today. And will begin having more orgasms Yael Wolfe .

To all my readers who are pulling for me, including Adam, Diabetic Cyborg, Sam McKenzie Jr. , James Finn , James Knight , Marley K. , Marty KC , Adam Gordon , Jean-Claude P and 922 others, I will post this and get right on to finishing the damned second screenplay. I ONLY have to write 60 pages by the Wednesday contest deadline, Brian Rowe . Remember, I didn’t stop procrastinating until today.

Finally, John Gorman , I pledge to write from the heart. To live in the moment. To connect with universal truth. And to do that in writing on Medium every single day for a year. Starting today.

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