I am so sorry you have had to go through that. Even more, I am saddened that people don’t use dining together as ways to learn about culture. Some of my favorite times include watching my Afganistán friends cook, hearing about their culture, and doing Sufi prayer dancing after dinner. Sharing food is an excellent time to get people to share their culture with you as well. I have been accused of cultural appropriation, when in fact I want to know deeply about other cultures and experiences, including historical and current suffering at the hands of a dominant culture, and not just enjoy their food.